Today is my first chemotherapy session. I slept well but awoke feeling very apprehensive about what lay ahead for me. I have a fear of needles and have no idea what has to happen, in hindsight that was a blessing. I had to do some self-talk and confirm Jesus as my Lord and Saviour. What lies ahead, what is it going to do to me, how will I feel after the treatment??? We had joked about what I would do if I lost my hair, shave my head and purchase cool, leather bandanas for Harley trips. I knew in my heart of hearts that I did not need to fear because Jesus was with me and He is in me. I had promises to hold on to. The voice that I had heard before questioning my standing in the Kingdom needed to be silenced. I sat down and started praying, this is what came to me from the Lord. All glory to His name.
There was mist over the forest this morning, the mist made the forest appear different but it was the same. The weather made it seem different, but beneath the mist lay the trees, birds, koala’s and critters. Our Father is the same today, as He was yesterday and as He will be tomorrow. He is holy and lovingly-committed to His children. God was showing me that even though the circumstances (weather) may change He never changes and His love for us NEVER changes!! AMEN.
The scripture I read was Judges 7. This is where Gideon is facing the Midianite army. The army is gathered and YHWH asks Gideon to cut his numbers down. In the end Gideon is left with 300 men. The Midianite army had camels and the camels were like grains of sand, too many to count. The people in the valley were as many as locusts. Gideon was not in a humanly comfortable position, YHWH knows this and he tells Gideon to take a walk down to the camp and eavesdrop on the army. God allows Gideon to be encouraged, to take heart and to confirm that He is with Gideon, that He is lovingly-committed to the Israelites. Gideon goes to hear what the enemy is saying about the impending war.
The enemy is unaware of what YHWH has planned, they are not aware of the size of Gideon’s army or how they were chosen. The 300 men were not chosen by strength or fighting ability, but on their water drinking skills. Gideon heard the enemy and was encouraged. The Midianites feared God’s power and presence. They recognised the power of the Living God and they were scared. Judges 7:13-14, they knew that God was fighting with the Israelites.
So, what does the enemy tell you? What whispers do you lend your ears too? The enemy knew that Gideon was a man of God. They knew that he was anointed and had a calling. This made the difference in the way that they spoke about Gideon. What does the enemy know about you? Are you known as a child of the Living King? Are you filled with love for His Son and the Set-Apart Spirit of Truth? You see, what you hear the enemy say will depend on who the enemy knows you as. The enemy will whisper things about you and you will hear those whispers.
The first time I went to see the radiology-oncologist I was sitting in the waiting room with Hubby. I was the youngest person there. Three weeks into the journey and I heard the enemy whisper, “How come you are the youngest one here? How do you explain your belief that you are loved by God if you are here?” I recognised the enemy’s whisper and was able to pray through it and rid myself of doubt.
Gideon heard the whisper and realised that the enemy feared God being with Gideon, on his side. This confirmed and encouraged Gideon’s faith. He had 300 men, but he had the King of Kings fighting with him against the enemy. Gideon went back to the camp and rejoiced in victory, he laid claim to the win. Powerful stuff.
The Israelites did not enter into the Promised Land when the spies returned because they listened to the whisper of the enemy – doubt was bred and grew amongst the nation. “There are giants there, they will kill us…” God was with the nation yet they doubted and missed out. What is the enemy’s take on you? Are you open for the taking or is your walk with God known to the enemy. Are you known as a son or daughter of the Living King. I once heard someone ask, “If being a Christian was breaking the law, is there enough evidence to convict you of the crime?”
Ephesians 4: 14-15
Then we will no longer be like children, forever changing our minds about what we believe because someone has told us something different. Or because someone has cleverly lied to us and made the lie sound like the truth. Instead we will hold on to the truth in love, becoming more and more in every way like Christ, Who is the Head of the His body, the Church.
If we know who we are in Christ, the enemy will fear Christ in us. We need to drink from the Living Water, keeping our eyes on Him and being humble and contrite in spirit.
‘For I know the plans that I am planning for you’ declares YHWH, ‘plans of peace and not of evil, to you a future and an expectancy. ‘Then you shall call on ME and shall come and pray to ME, and I shall listen to you. And you shall seek ME and shall find ME when you search for ME with ALL your heart.”
We serve a Father that has amazing plans for us, the enemy is not aware of these plans. Are you? Do you pray, call and earnestly seek? Who do you listen too? Be victorious and experience joy. Fear brings doubt.
After this journal entry my first chemo session was a bit scary – those needles are not fun, but I kept lapping up the Water and thanking my Saviour for His loving-commitment to me.