What are Your intentions for me?


A glorious night! I slept like a log with no nausea. The previous evening (17/11) I experienced waves of nausea caused by the chemo. I could feel them washing over me and it was a frightening experience. I got up a number of times to take medication but decided to pray through the waves and not put more chemicals in my body. I thank Jesus for His broken body that has healing and brings healing.

The first week of treatment has passed. I started this week with 32 days ahead, now there are only 26 left. Praise God for His grace and providence. I have seen the other side of this illness. It is no longer just a word – Cancer – it is a reality and the oncology wards are filled with a variety of ages and people from all walks of life. It is an illness that knows no boundaries and touches more lives than we realise. It is when you are inside the circle that you see the strength of others. You realise that you don’t have it bad – there is always someone that is doing it worse than you are. However it is very important to know that what you are experiencing is real and you must not minimise your experience. It sucks and is not fun! Then there are the families that stand by and see loved ones going through this. I think of my darling husband and his support, I look at my beautiful daughters and it breaks my heart that they have to watch me going through this. I think of my beautiful mother that lost her own mum to cancer – I had an amazing Grandmother and love her to bits. My mother is not near me, she is thousands of kilometres away and it must be so hard for her.

All these thoughts, yet I know it is not about me. It is about my Abba Father and His grace, for all these loving family members. It is about everyone in the oncology ward – the dedicated nurses, the lunch lady, the oncologist and specialists. I am to be a witness, to show others that although the chips are down I will fish for the Lord (that was cheesy).

This morning’s reading was Exodus 34.

Verse 14: ‘You must worship no other gods but only the Lord, for He is a God who is passionate about His relationship with you.

Exodus 33: 13-14

In verse 13 Moses asks God to make His intentions known so that Moses will understand what God wants him to do. We often can’t understand what it is we are going through, why are we going through it? What is it that YHWH wishes us to do for Him?

In verse 14: “And the Lord replied, “I will PERSONALLY go with you Moses. I will give you rest – everything will benefit you.”

Moses seeks God’s will. He asks God for guidance so that he may fulfil the purpose of his life in the Kingdom. Moses asks YHWH to reveal His intentions, His plans. Moses goes on to ask God to reveal His glorious presence. This speaks of a relationship – not an average relationship but a passionate one. A relationship where Moses is not afraid to ask YHWH for things.

In verse 17 we read: “And the Lord replied to Moses, “Indeed I will do what you have asked for you have found FAVOUR with Me, you are My FRIEND.” Oh Lord that You would see me as Your friend.

Moses had God’s favour in his life, because of this God honoured the requests of His friend. Moses does not ask for things that are ungodly. He seeks the will of God. Jesus told us that if we seek we will find, Moses was seeking the intentions of YHWH so that he could be obedient and bring Him honour by fulfilling the purposes of the King. Moses wants to know exactly what God wants, he wants to see the glory of God.

In verse 16 we read, ‘If You don’t go with us, how will anyone know that we have found favour with You? How else will they know that we are special and distinct from all other people on Earth?’

In this verse Moses acknowledges the favour of YHWH. He acknowledges that where the favour of the King is, there is victory, overcoming and blessings. The favour of God is powerful and is bestowed upon His children that seek His will. Moses has experienced the favour of Elohim, he lead the Israelites out of Egypt, saw the Red Sea part, ate manna and quail that fell from the Heavens, was warmed by a pillar of fire at night and sheltered by a cloud during the day. Not to mention shoes that never wore thin and clothes that never wore out. Moses had experienced the provision of a lovingly-committed Father. He realised that the favour of the Lord was upon Him. When last did you do a stocktake on your life? Do you take small things for granted? Do you expect to get up each morning and face the day with health, full tummy and dressed in respectable clothes – surely the favour of the Lord is upon you.

In verse 16 Moses also shows his dependence on God, he is not willing to move without God. Do we move without asking the Lord what it is He desires for us? Do we know where the path goes? Jesus is the WAY, the Truth and the Light – NOBODY comes to the Father but through Him. When the Father hears Moses is not willing to budge without YHWH, the Father answers him and calls him a friend. What a powerful thing to be called a friend of God.

So how do we do what Moses did? Well, it is all about the heart – when Samuel was to anoint one of Jesse’s sons as the next king of Israel, the Lord told him that man looks to the outer, but God looks at the heart. What is the motive? Is it self seeking or God seeking?

Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and ALL these things shall be added. Seek the will of the Father for your life. If we are full of the Set-Apart Spirit then we will have pure motives, Godly motives and you will find His favour and be called His friend. You can’t seek His favour, it is bestowed upon you. Search for His will and desire to serve Him with an undivided heart.

Genesis 34: 11,12,14,18 and 21 hold some advice for us.

V11: God tells Moses that he is to obey ALL the commands – Listen

V12: Don’t compromise by making pacts with the unsaved/worldly things.

V13: Break down the idols in your life. Anything that is more important than God is an idol.

V14: God is YHWH and He is passionate about you. Lovingly-committed to you.

V18: Break bread and remember what Jesus did for you.

V21: Rest – take the Sabbath day seriously.

V22: Tithe, give 10% to the Lord, he gives you everything.


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